Smooth needs rough … or something like that
The UK’s most popular new year’s resolution is to lose weight. Why mention this in July? Because good research says that by the end of this month practically everyone who set a new year goal will have turfed it.
Statistically, four in five people bowed out by the third Monday in January (hence Blue Monday), but by July’s end the last remaining stragglers, who held on so valiantly, are now calling time on it too.
There’s no shame or judgement here. None. Change is massively, massively difficult.
Dieting is such a generous example because it demonstrates how change is rarely just one thing. Change is compromise across the piste. It is concession and it is sacrifice. It’s annoying.
Dieting ain’t just about the food. If only it was that simple …
No change in a vacuum
Changing diet / losing weight. It’s double tough. Without help we have to singlehandedly reconfigure our hardwired and well-practiced values, customs and instincts around food.
And sleep, probably. It’s nearly impossible to lose weight without a baseline of good sleep. Poor sleep triggers release of both ghrelin (the hunger hormone) and cortisol (stress). The first leads to overeating and the second causes fat storage.
Then there’s cost and planning. It tends to costs more to eat healthily and that’ll likely mean sacrifice in other life areas. Prepping decent food in advance is another essential; else the takeaway menu starts to look good.
There’s also the long-term investment in your taste buds. Every person has a so-called ‘bliss point’ (a level of salty / fatty / sweet that really hits the spot) and it takes real commitment to turn its volume down before you start to crave cabbage over crisps.
Lastly there’s lifestyle. We all have social relationships based on food and / or booze. Are we going to bin pub-lunch-Sunday, bottomless brunch, or Friday night drinks? It takes tremendous will power to deflect the peer pressure and hit a soda water and salad.
Dieting touches nearly every domain. If it was easy we’d have done it by now.
I want to <blank> (without the <blank>) …
A key reason human beings set ambitious goals, including new years resolutions, is our tendency to see a goal in a vacuum and underestimate how widespread (and inconvenient) the micro goals within the macro goal are.
Soon the macro goal pales in significance versus its nuances, minutiae and annoyances.
A recent blog by author, dotcom guru and TED co-creator Seth Godin (well worth a follow) demonstrates beautifully the concessions one has to make when striving for a goal, or upholding an ideal.
“I’d like to run a marathon (without getting tired).”
“I’m in favor of everyone having a car (without the sprawl, pollution and injuries.)”
“I’m in favor of meetings where everyone has a voice (without endless meetings).”
To quote David Brent quoting Dolly Parton: “If you want the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain.”
The same goes for managing money.
Rough with smooth then
Maybe managing money in Seth Godin format, might go like this:
I want to save more money (without compromising my lifestyle).
I want to invest (without the risk of losing money).
I want to budget properly (without the admin).
I want a pay rise (without spending more time at work).
I want a comfortable retirement (without faffing on a pension).
Like dieting, money management requires concessions every which way. It touches many more domains and areas of life than first it appears. It’s not just about the money.
It may require an overhaul of your social life. A rewiring of your instincts. There may be a little more risk and a little less cash. A little more research and a little less fun. Fewer nights / meals / adventures out and more nights / meals / adventures in.
But if the goal is worth it, then the goal is worth it. Concessions, sacrifice, annoyances are part of it. Rough with the smooth, then.
We’re help to help (coming soon)
Science says that the steadiest and most sustainable way to lose weight, in fact to successfully change anything, is making little adaptations and sticking with them for the long haul, ideally with help and support on-side.
Re money management, this is the Money Means goal. And yes there have been annoyances, sacrifices and concessions along the way.
Still, Money Means testers are still in full flight and comments continue to astound us. The platform can’t deliver financial change itself, but feedback assures is it helps (every which way) to take the sting out.
We’re still in BETA mode so we’d still love you to join our tester group. If this sounds up your street please email hello@moneymeans.co.uk.